Happy

     With a little help from my better half and from God, I grew this person. Today he is big.  Today he is a teenager.  And today I forgive him for his hormonal door-slamming outbursts.  Today I love him even more than I did when he flew out of me like a rocket, all wrinkly and red. Today he is 160 lbs. of muscle and he pummels his opponents on the football field right before reaching out a hand to help them up.  Today he waves and says hello to all of our neighbors in that deep resonant voice of his, the same voice that called me a hypocrite and then apologized profusely because he didn't mean it. Today, he is preparing for a new journey in a new school with a new posse. Today he wears his father's cologne, and the smell of my man-boy makes me feel old.
   At one time he toted a license plate on his tricycle that read, "Happy Guy."  I watched him scurry his chubby little legs down the block petting dogs, squealing with delight from his dad's tickle tortures.  He would talk to anyone who listened, and they all listened; the construction workers around the corner, Calvin, our super, and Judith, the ever-present manager at D'Agostinos.  He rarely cried unless he was truly hurting like when we hastily bought a dog and then heartlessly returned it the next day.  My happy guy cried for weeks and I wondered when I would forgive myself for it.  At one time he sheepishly stepped in wet cement with his brand new Reebox.  He was four, and he was embarrassed.   At one time he ate pizza with his teacher and played Monopoly with his grandpa.  I combed his little boy hair all wispy and blonde and marveled at his huge, sapphire eyes.
     My mother says, "When you dwell on the past, it becomes the present."  She is a wise and wonderful woman. Well, Mom, I don't dwell where my not so little man is concerned because the present is quite good.  He listens, he errs on the side of caution and does his best to do his best. When it's bad, it's just bad, not terrible.  And when it's good, it's really good.
     So today, I am  reminiscent.  I am thankful.  I am happy.